Too Wet
Confession: I Get Sad When I Think About Sad Things

I know it may seem strange, but I get sad when I think about sad stuff. Broken-legged puppies, divorce, obituaries. It all makes me upset. “It’s OK to cry sometimes, don’t worry about it,” you would probably say to me, like my friends often do. But they don’t get it. I’m different from other people and I’m finally ready to admit it:

I Lived to Regret My Make-A-Wish

As a woman who spent her adolescence fighting a tumor the size of a melon, I’m lucky to be alive. I pause for a moment of gratitude every morning to take in the sunrise and thank God for my life.

Too Wet
CONFESSION: I’m More of a Gay Best Friend Than My Gay Best Friend

My gay best friend Andrew came over one Sunday for a tradition we have called “Us Night” where we drink wine, watch movies and talk shit about our best girlfriends. After watching the scene in My Best Friend’s Wedding where Rupert Everett sassily tells Julia Roberts that she needs to get her shit together, I confirmed a sneaking suspicion I’ve had for weeks. I’m the Rupert Everett.

In Love With My Waxer
Confession: I’m in Love with My Bikini Waxer

This year I realized my husband’s been spending too much time planting tomato seeds in the garden and not enough time banging the shit out of me. I didn’t know what to do about it. I needed some aggression in my life. And then I found her: Wantana, my bikini waxer.

I Don't Have HPV And I Feel Left Out
I Don’t Have HPV and I Feel Left Out

While browsing of the outbreak section on the CDC website, I came across a concerning statistic on HPV – almost every sexually active person contracts a type of the virus at some point in his or her life. But I haven’t. Why have I been excluded from this club?

short distance relationship
How I Survive My Short-Distance Relationship

My boyfriend Matt and I have been living together in our 300 sq. ft. studio apartment in the Upper East Side for three months, and I am done. No really—I’m done with all of it. I’m done with work, showering, friends, and the outside world. I’m staying put here in this tiny, stuffy space, with just the two of us. I deserve this intense happiness.

Harem Pants
Confession: I’ve Been Taking Dumps in My Harem Pants

As a true fashionista, I show 100% commitment to all trends, especially the ones that make you look like you’re carrying a load in your pants. Harem pants aren’t going anywhere, and as long as they’re here, I’m taking full advantage.